Hair Dryer Voiced by: Paul Ward Birthplace: Toronto, Canada Hair Color: Heroin Brown Eye Color: Cannabis Green Height: 6'4" Age: 21 Likes: Drugs, furries Dislikes: Purple Flaming Dragon Clan's Anti-Drug Campaign Sexuality: Sleazy/furry Role: Owner of the Kitty Katina and secret backer of the Al Bhed cause. Background: Hair Dryer is the wealthiest man in the Kingdom of Canada. Dryer managed to acquire his vast amount of wealth by trafficking Canada's most abundant resource, cannabis. In his spare time he sells pot... holders... made from hemp. Dryer was the owner of the international corporation Ecstasy Inc., formerly known as Shinra Co. (after their drop in the stock market, Dryer bought them out). After replacing mako with meth, Dryer became Middle Earth's leading supplier of "natural remedies." Though upon discovery of mako as a hallucinogenic, Dryer immediately started mass production of the drug "MSD" (mako-stimulated dream), a drug so mind-blowingly powerful that instead of tasting colors, they taste you, now without the costly trip to Soviet Russia. Unfortunately for Dryer, constant use of MSD results in mako poisoning. After a series of lawsuits, Ecstasy Inc. neared bankruptcy. To avoid heavy losses, Dryer sold all of his stock to foreign (and ill-informed) investors. This criminal action soon became known as the Second Impact of Enron. With more gil than ever before, Hair Dryer opened up a bar called "Kitties Kantina." Due to the sexual innuendo of the bar's name, business boomed. Shortly afterwards, catgirls began to turn in applications as erotic—er—exotic dancers by the hundreds. Luckily for them, Dryer happened to have a major furry-fetish, thus they were all employed. Within weeks, Dryer became the publisher of the adult magazine "Furry Monthly," which featured all of Dryer's catgirls except his two favorites, Si and Am (the two of which Dryer keeps near his side at his bar as dancers). Fun Facts: Dryer's VA has actually been to Canada. Yeah, we didn't believe it, either.